Group sex may be an exciting addition to your sex life and especially so if you and/or your partner are into the unconventional and kinky. Group sex may feature in your lifestyle and sexual preferences or may just be an item you eager to cross off that long bucket list. Either way, a good start to making a reality of it is in finding participants; consenting adults, willing to come out and play.
Finding group sex participants may be particularly challenging, especially in a rigidly conservative society that unanimously disapproves such indulgences, looking upon them with evident frowning. The larger community may consider individuals that associate with this practice moral degenerates, who are left social pariahs that everyone is eager to give a wide berth. However, there are several safe and orthodox approaches and tried alternatives to finding these partners as highlighted.
Look to a friend
Through social interaction, you and/or your partner may notice persons within your circle of friends with an adventurous spirit and a sense of wonder regarding matters sexual. This would definitely be the first person(s) to pitch the idea of group sex to. It makes it even more interesting if you have an attraction for this person and a gush of sexual energy, characterized mostly by uninhibited heavy flirtation defines your encounters.
A group sex experience may change the dynamics of your friendship. It is important to establish ground rules and discuss possible eventualities, as well as address all concerns raised before diving in.
Online platforms
One of the most common places to find individuals with similar interests is Swinglifestyle, it is the biggest site for group sex and is free. You want to avoid personal ads on online platforms such as Plenty of Fish or on Craigslist because it is not private. SwingersTaboo gives you a great selection to choose from and you can look through the profiles, apply filter techniques and find exactly what you are looking for.
It is important to stick with a safe site like Swinglifestyle, as there are many psychos and criminals trawling online. As a precaution, meet this individual in a public place and share a moment as you get to know each other before actually inviting them into your bedroom for a group sex session.
Scout the options together
Finding a person for your group sex plans may be as easy as jointly picking someone. It could be that attractive young man behind the bar in your favorite pub, or the beautiful woman who has been stealing glances your way all night. You and your partner may consciously look around, discuss possible options, eventually make a go for it, and approach the person together.
Swinger clubs
Swinger and other such clubs are always a great place to add to the numbers for your group sex team. The upside to this approach lies in the fact that you can expect no judgment as the community consists of similar-minded individuals. One-on-one interactions also help create a connection before moving to having a group sex encounter.
Group sex, in its many variations is a practice that is more common than many would care to admit. These highlights outline safe ways to meet and partner with persons that share this interest.
An open relationship is a relationship where you can have sex with whoever you want without any restrictions from your partner. Talk it over with your partner before starting such a relationship.
This will avoid any hard feelings that may come up. You may be that kind of a guy who will like to date many women, be open about it from the start so it doesn’t cause a problem down the line. In such a case, the best type of relationship for you to engage in is an open relationship because it will give u the freedom date whoever you like.
This type of relationship also offers you the freedom to engage in different types of romance with different girls which will satisfy your sexual desires. Here are some benefits of open relationship that you should consider:
You will overcome cases of jealousy in a relationship
In case you have not stated clearly that it is an open relationship, your lover will always feel jealousy if you try to be with other women intimately.
If you neglect to discuss the type of relationship you want with your partner, it will cause problems later in the relationship.
Jealousy in a relationship can sometimes lead to murder or suicide hence being truthful with your partner will rid the relationship of any jealousy issues that may arise.
This type of relationship is not for everyone, but all parties involved can benefit greatly from it.
After you and your partner decide to get involved in this type of relationship, everything will be sorted because your partner will be fully aware that you are free to interact with whoever you desire.
You will enjoy more sex
There are sometimes instances where you may admire a certain girl but is unable to act on those feelings because of the type of relationship you have with your partner.
In an open relationship, you will be able to interact with different girls and experience a variety of sexual partners.
In case you are a man who craves sexual variety, this type of relationship will expose you to different girls hence satisfying your desires.
You will be more satisfied in the relationship
There are some qualities you may like your partner to have but they aren’t in your lover.
You may also be scared to share these qualities out of fear of endangering your relationship.
You may like some aspects in your lover but those aspects that you will miss you can easily get them in other people for you to enjoy life.
In engaging in an open type of relationship, you will interact with different people out of whom can easily satisfy your desires.
This type of relationship will allow you to avoid being in a relationship in which your forcing yourself to stay.
I’m not an exhibitionist. And while I enjoy sex, I’m not into anything out there or over-the-top.
Which is why I was surprised to find myself, a few weeks ago, having sex with my husband while a group of strangers watched.
So how did it come to this?
Out on a dinner date out a few weeks ago, my partner and I were cruising around the streets with a post-meal ice cream when we came across Sydney’s Couples Club.
Curious, we Googled it when we got home to see what that discreet unmarked door was hiding.
Turns out, it’s a sex club and its monthly First Time Friday night was coming up. On a whim, we decided to check it out.
It felt like less pressure to visit during a time when we wouldn’t be the only ones who had never done anything like this before.
To swing, or not to swing?
We didn’t necessarily go with the intention of swinging, swapping partners or even “playing” (as the site described) with others - we were just curious and keen to explore something sexually new.
We love visiting strip clubs together (who doesn’t love a gorgeous woman dancing around?) so we knew we’d be comfortable with nudity, but laid out a few ground rules before we went.
For us, we decided if we felt like it, we would be game to have sex in front of others. We weren’t up for letting others join though, and agreed if it was something either of us wanted to do in the moment, we could talk about it afterwards and go back for another visit to possibly pursue.
Our first First Time Friday
The Friday finally rolled around, and I had a glass of wine while getting ready for the evening.
I put on a new set of Agent Provocateur lingerie and sent a selfie to my BFF (who is a psychologist and was also super curious to hear about our experience) before we grabbed a bottle of champagne and hopped in an Uber — the club is BYOB, but there’s a bar you bring your alcohol to so a bartender can serve it to you.
As soon as we arrived, we were buzzing. After climbing three flights of red carpeted stairs, were reached the entrance where we were told the house rules: simply approach others you’re interested in, but if they put up a palm, it signals “no”, and vice versa.
Other than that, the jacuzzi, outdoor terrace and play room were our proverbial oyster.
Setting the mood
We headed to the bar to have a glass or two of champagne first and take in the scene. Several screens showed various porn movies, there was a stripper pole in the middle of the room, and the bartender was in fishnets and underwear.
Several other couples were hanging around the bar, and within moments, a woman was bent over and being spanked. It was more humorous than sexy, and everyone seemed to be trying really hard to look natural and comfortable.
As we finished our drinks, a dancer entered and cleared the room to perform a striptease on the pole.
An older man loudly whooped and yelled throughout the entire performance, but it wasn’t anything crazy and we decided we wanted to go downstairs to see more.
Several open yet separate rooms had various beds and couches scattered about, and most were occupied with couples having sex or several people tangled up in each other.
Props like whips and paddles decorated the rooms, and there were attachments against some walls to tie someone up with.
Our turn
My partner and I saw a small, empty room containing one small bed and looked at each other and shrugged. “Why the hell not?” we thought.
I jumped on top, and during the time were we in there, a steady stream of people approached to try and join or just watch.
For me, I wasn’t particularly turned on by that, but wasn’t bothered either as obviously it came with the territory.
The verdict
After we got dressed and left, we agreed we were glad we went (and came), but did it more for a good story than it being something either of us were really into.
Every person and couple has their own preferences and fetishes, and if exploring with others is your thing, it’s definitely worth checking out.
Last spring my husband and I were looking for an adults-only vacation to celebrate our tenth anniversary. I came across a "clothing optional lifestyle takeover cruise." The materials talked about dance parties, clothing-optional areas, and playrooms, including a dungeon. We assumed "lifestyle" meant BDSM. It was only after we'd booked the trip that we realized it meant swingers. We figured we could still go, even though we didn't plan to participate.
Leading up to the cruise, though, we got to know some of the other couples online and began to change our minds. It started with talk of me being interested in playing with other women and evolved into "Let's just go for it and enjoy all this cruise has to offer."
We really didn't know what to expect when we got there, and were definitely surprised. Some people were completely nude, some just topless, some in tiny outfits, and some fully clothed. We kept our swimsuits on. No one seemed to mind, or even notice, what anyone else was or wasn't wearing.
The first evening there was a toga/gods/goddesses party. My husband dressed as a Roman gladiator and I made a toga out of a sheer purple fabric. We danced with a couple we'd chatted with online, who were in white togas. We didn't get naked, but there was some flashing and roaming hands. My husband and I are "full swap," which means that we are okay with penetrative sex with other people, but their rules were stricter than ours.. They do not kiss or have penetrative sex with others.
After the dance club closed, we all went to the 24-hour outdoor play area. There were beds spaced about every six feet with small tables between them. We all went to one bed and started by getting undressed and making out with our own partners. Soon I felt the woman's hand caressing my breast as I was kissing my husband. Then her husband, while still kissing her, started to finger me.
At one point my husband went to the restroom. While he was gone, the other guy went down on his wife while I kissed her and played with her breasts. Then we shifted and I went down on him while she went down on me. When my husband came back, he watched for a minute, then joined us.
The atmosphere of the cruise made us more open to trying new things.
After a little while, I started giving my husband head while the other couple had sex. He'd had a lot to drink and to his dismay wasn't getting hard. We tried a couple times, but it wasn't going to happen. We played a little while the other couple finished up, and then we all went to the hot tubs.
The atmosphere of the cruise made us more open to trying new things. Throughout the week, we had two more play sessions with other couples, including a six-way group session with the same couple from the first night.
There has to be some physical attraction when we decide who to play with, but the connection we form with a couple is the bigger factor. We want to play with people who are fun and stable in their relationship. We have a very low tolerance for drama. Since we play only as a couple, there has to be a four-way match in terms of attraction.
One day we were talking to a couple and the woman stripped down to nothing but a smile and just kept on chatting. This was very awkward for us, but we tried not to let it show. Ten minutes later, her husband stripped down too. He suggested that we do the same, but we declined. He asked us about making a playdate, and I told him that I didn't think we had the four-way match we needed for us to be comfortable. For the rest of the week she was cordial when we'd run into them, but he wouldn't even say hello to us. I felt bad for possibly leading him on. Unfortunately, that's the way it goes sometimes.
Before the trip, I thought swingers were people who would have sex with any random person. But those we've met want the same thing that we want: friendship with like-minded couples, and if we happen to have fun in sexual ways from time to time, that's a bonus.
Now we play with others about once a month. Unfortunately, there is not a single lifestyle club in the entire state where we live. We play only as a couple and only together in the same room. We like to be within reach so we can play and talk to each other at the same time. It's about group play, not just swapping partners.
Condoms are a must. We both have veto power, meaning that if there is a man I want to play with, my hubby can say no at any time for any reason and it will not happen, whether he's not comfortable with the guy or isn't interested in playing with his wife. We rarely play at our house, but if we do it is only with a couple we know really well, and never in our bed—that is only for us.
We talk to several couples we met on the cruise on a weekly basis. One we've become really good friends with, and we get together often with our kids. We do the same things other families do but sometimes, after the kids are in bed, we lock the door and get naked. Sometimes we start with a dinner date and drinks, or just hang out with the kids until they're all asleep. We might play a game like sexy dice or watch a movie with sexual undertones.
We haven't had a successful session yet with another couple where we both had penetrative sex. My husband overthinks it and can't maintain an erection. We have talked to several other men in the lifestyle and they all said that it is very common in the beginning, especially if you've been exclusively with your partner for a long time.
Neither of us have any romantic feelings for our play partners at all, but we do see them as friends. There are definitely people we are attracted to, both mentally and physically, but romance and love are just for us.
Other than the couple that we said no to on the cruise, no one has ever made us uncomfortable. We have been asked to do things that we have rules against. For example, there is a couple who generally play separately, but we play only as a couple. We've made this clear to them. We still talk to them and joke around; we just know that we won't be play partners and that's okay.
Swinging has helped our sex life, because after a night of playing with others we always come back and talk about the experience and have really hot sex with each other during the conversation. I don't know if we will stay in the lifestyle forever, but we are definitely having fun for now.
”Well, everything starts with my wife Irene – my muse and the guardian of our home comfort. With all these years of marriage behind, I’m still into her. And I’ve started admiring her body even more, having by now studied it better than the one of mine. We make a perfect match in bed, both of us are always satisfied. Yet I have never thought it is bad sex that kindles desire for new people.
When my business partner Eric started seducing me, I thought I’d just turn it into another secret date that Irene would never know about – the way I was doing in previous relationships. But something there stopped me. Probably they were the soft eyes of Beth, his wife. I wouldn't want these eyes to look at me with anger and reproach. And I decided my sex with Eric shall happen only if Beth either approves it or joins us in.
First proposal
It took me some time to think it over. My desire to Eric was still there without ebbing, so one day I took my chance. I said I wanted to have sex with him and his wife. Eric smiled back and replied: “But first this shall be you and Beth. I want you to be my gift to her. And I want you to present me with Irene”. These words made me feel choky. The fantasy of coming as a present to my friend’s wife was the most effective aphrodisiac for me. I was looking at Eric with appreciation, though nothing has happened yet. Because his idea was much better than the one I had.
I knew that arranging a threesome or a quad was not an easy task at all. Where two can find common ground, a third one may come with some nuances. While the proposed decision was brilliant. We start with sex in two; and if we make a match, we can play further on.
This is what actually happened. Beth was shy until her first coming. But this impaired neither sex nor the orgasm. As to Eric and Irene, I don’t know how things happened between them. I remember myself talking her into this first try; her initial respond was indignation and she would not talk to me for a couple of hours. But then she changed it into curious looking at Eric during our joint dinners. Eric and I, we are partners in running a restaurant and thus we sometimes dine together, the two families.
Second offer
I don’t know when she changed her mind; I guess this happened when I was away. But one day she told me about her date with Eric. She said she enjoyed it. I was glad to hear this. It was a different kind of excitement, not the same I felt the moment I was offering my best friend to her. And it occurred to me that what aroused me most was the process of proposing something new, daring and unusual. And so I took the next step: suggested we should have sex in four. Irene agreed at the drop of the hat. This time I did not have to persuade her into.
The next day I made the same proposal to Beth and Eric.
Arrangement details
I shall mention here the issue that may seem boring, but for me this was an essential point. All of us had our tests before the Night. This made us wait a little bit for the event so longed for, but on the other hand it gave us some extra time to think over the details. The dating was arranged in our house. We don’t have children and thus there’s no need to keep to bedroom sex only.
In order to avoid eventual awkwardness of the night’ starting point we prepared some erotic games. It was rather easy now that Irene is an expert in event management. Of course she does not have orgies listed in her professional track record, but she knows the ropes in managing groups of non-structured people. We didn’t play the spin bottle or strip poker or anything of the kind. Right from the start we followed the dark side of our desires. Each of the four was fulfilling desires of other participants in plain sight. The desires had been listed beforehand, we broke them down into three categories: pleasing, exciting, igniting.
First experience continues
I’m not here to describe the process proper, I would only say we enjoyed it. We proceed dating in four, and we plan taking joint trip to a swingers’ resort. Sometimes a two of our four meet alone. No one keeps record of these dates. When in secret, things become even more spicy.
We have planned a joint holiday to meet new couples looking to swing. We are interested in learning other swingers. But since we are people of name in our hometown, extra attention is not something we want.
Aren’t soft swing couples
We’ve been in contact with other swingers on forums and in apps for swingers, and they told us we are nowhere near to soft swing couples that we used to refer ourselves to. We thought that soft swing implies occasional dates with one and the same couple. While real swinging stands for multiple couples, meetings always in four and leaving no space for sex in two. But it turned out that soft swing stands for two couples having sex in one room without partners swapping. Seems strange ‘cos I think this is just usual public sex. I mean, if a couple makes love in park you cannot call it soft swing. But anyway, since we practice partners swapping and in general arrange ourselves in intricate combinations that feature four people we are cool, hard swingers. Seems funny. But now I know for sure that soft swing couples are not our match J “.
John.
This story prompts us to experiments and introduces new ideas to the dreams that we already have. This is why we love reading about fulfillment of somebody else’s fantasies.
