There is no better way of putting the spice back into your relationship than to experiment with couples dating otherwise known as the swinging lifestyle. It’s something that more and more people are looking into and it’s a great way to meet new people and strengthen a relationship while fulfilling sexual desires. Being able to act out naughty fantasies means that couple are less likely to “cheat” on one another because they are given permission to engage in the activity.
To avoid any jealousy from taking over, some couples set boundaries. The boundaries are there to keep their emotional bond between them in place. For example, some couples has a “no kissing on the lips” rule that is adhere to by both partners. Some might think that “sharing” their partner with somebody else would have detrimental effects, but many couples find it actually makes them more open with each another.
If you are a couple and interested in dating other couples visit SwingersTaboo.com, the swingers dating site to connect with other like-minded people like you. You can sign up for FREE as a couple. Joining a couples dating website allows you to connect with others, set a date for a casual encounter and get the opportunity to search for people who live near you. You also have the chance to browse through members pictures which is a great way to really see who catches your eye.
Sex is erotic, pleasurable and keeps us feeling happy – this is what swinging can offer. We weren’t made to have sex with one person for the rest of our lives and we shouldn’t feel that restraint. You can be in love with one person but have sex with many. Exploring your sexual side with both men and women will make you feel alive and much more together in everyday life.
If you want to be a third in somebody else’s relationship, then sign up for Swingers Dating now and have a browse. What are you waiting for? Life is about doing things that you’re scared to day, to do things that both scare and excite you. Swinging can open a whole new world and make your sex life flourish.
Most women would run for the hills if they found out their new boyfriend was a serial cheat.
But when Terri Ellwood discovered her date had been unfaithful to his ex-wife more than ten times, she had a very different reaction.
Lee Blackley told her the only way he could remain “faithful” would be if she allowed him to sleep with other women.
Desperate to make a go of it, Terri AGREED — and promised to be there while he did it.
Now the pair both regularly sleep with other couples and, as they prepare to tie the knot this year, the bride-to-be admits becoming a swinger was the only way to save her relationship.
Terri, 26, says: “I love it now but at first I wasn’t so sure.
“I really liked Lee and was devastated when I found out he’d cheated on every past partner.
“I didn’t want to end things and I knew he liked me too.
“He asked if I could come round to the idea of swinging.
“I thought it was just for weird older couples but when he showed me all the attractive young couples on swinging websites, I thought I should give it a go.
“Now I’m happily a swinger with Lee, and I’m safe in the knowledge he’ll never cheat — unless I’m in the room.”
Terri, from Lowestoft, Suffolk, first met engineer Lee in February 2015 after joining dating site Plenty of Fish.
The two hit it off and just four weeks later, met for their first date.
Terri, a retail worker, thought she had found the man of her dreams, until Lee, 30, made a shock confession.
She says: “We had been talking until the early hours and getting on so well, then Lee just blurted it out.
“He told me he had never been able to be faithful to any girlfriends, and even admitted having a secret ‘cheating’ phone to organise his late-night hook-ups.
“I was gobsmacked. Lee was adamant he wanted to stay with me but admitted he struggled to remain faithful, sexually, due to such a strong desire to sleep with other women. I doubted how we could ever make this work.”
Despite Lee’s confession, Terri gave him a chance and the pair made their relationship official in April 2015.
SWINGING: WHAT IS IT?
Practice of engaging in group sex or the swapping of sexual partners within a group, especially on a habitual basis.
But six months later, Lee called Terri with a very surprising offer.
She recalls: “Lee said he wanted to be with me but asked if we could bring someone else into the bedroom for a threesome. It was totally out of the blue.
“I wanted Lee to be happy and I’d always been open-minded but the idea of being with someone else made me nervous. Lee was really patient and understanding.
“We discussed it for hours, how it would work, who it would be with. I ended up being intrigued by the idea.”
The following night, Lee showed Terri a swinging website where they could find a potential third person to join them.
She says: “I really enjoyed looking at the different women with Lee and when we both found one of them attractive, I was actually excited to message her.
“She wrote back saying she was interested and I knew I wanted to try it.”
Two weeks later they met her in a hotel, with Terri feeling “terrified” Lee would “like her more than me”.
She adds: “But as soon as I met her, I felt at ease. After chatting and flirting a bit we started to become intimate in the bedroom.
“It was such a thrill when Lee watched me with her, and I really enjoyed watching Lee too.
“When we went home Lee and I sat up for hours talking about it — what we liked and what we didn’t.”
Despite it being their first time, Lee was keen to introduce more people to their relationship.
She says: “We signed up to swingers websites to meet other couples and a few months later, we had our first foursome. It was just as thrilling as the first time.
“We now meet couples a lot more as we find it more enjoyable — and with another couple, there is more fun for everyone.”
Terri and Lee attend swinging parties every six weeks, always using protection — although it takes a lot of planning to find someone to share their bed.
Terri says: “Most of it is done online. We choose together.
“If one of us doesn’t fancy them then we have a rule where we can veto them.
“You don’t just go to a party and that’s it. When you meet couples you message each other and have a social meet beforehand to warm up to the main event — just like dating.
“We have a few regular couples we meet at hotels.
“It took a while to get used to sex parties.
“At first we just watched but now we are getting more involved and I love it. I’m a totally different person when I’m there.
“So far we’ve been with just over ten different couples between us, and we’ve swung everywhere — hotels, houses and even a caravan.”
Despite Terri and Lee’s free attitude to partner sharing, they have a set of rules they both must abide by.
She says: “When it comes to sex, we do everything together: that’s the most important rule.
“We never meet anyone on our own and we always message as a couple.
“It’s important that he respects me.
“I never thought I’d be OK with seeing my boyfriend have sex with another woman, let alone be comfortable with him seeing me sleep with another man. It’s centred around trust.
“I would not be OK with Lee meeting someone on his own. I would consider that cheating.”
Other stipulations include no kissing and the couple are only allowed to swing away from their home.
Terri says: “I made the rule early on that kissing isn’t allowed — and we never meet anyone in our home.
“Our bedroom is sacred to me. I don’t mix swinging but our private relationship is in our house.
“Sex with just the two of us is still the most important thing to me. It’s vital to have your own intimate relationship alongside swinging.”
Facts and figures
Two million people in the UK swap partners to spice up their sex lives
60% of swingers say swinging has been beneficial to their relationship
Clubs, holidays & websites are available for swingers to set up partner swapping
10% of swingers have an STI
Now, more than two years after Lee’s cheating bombshell, the couple are happier than ever.
Lee has no intention of straying — in fact, they are planning their wedding for October.
Terri says: “I’ve never been more in love. I sometimes get jealous and worry other women are better than me, or more attractive.
“But Lee is quick to reassure me that I’m the one he loves. I can’t wait to tie the knot — but it’ll definitely be just the two of us on our wedding night.
“I love sharing my man with other women but now I know it’s me taking him home.”
Lee says: “When I first met Terri, I knew she was the one for me.
“I could have kept on lying to her but I knew that if I was dishonest, it would all come out in the end.
“I know cheating doesn’t get you anywhere but in a bog-standard relationship I’m always looking at ways of making it exciting.
I hope everyone is on track to crushing your goals for this year! When I first heard the term “swingers,” it was on a talk show and I thought it was a crazy concept, like you might as you are reading this. However, before bashing swingers, listen to how it could benefit some of you.
Swingers are couples or singles who choose to have an open relationship, allowing their partners to have sex with other people, with their permission, of course. I began to learn why this type of relationship can work for anyone willing to follow the rules, respect one another, be honest, get tested for STDs, use protection, and be very selective in choosing partners and remaining private about such a new way of what some couples swear by, a healthy relationship
In the swinging world, couples make their own rules around what they need within relationships and marriages and vow to abide by the boundaries set forth. Couples or singles who select this type of lifestyle seek one or many partners for the pure excitement of getting from one partner what they don’t receive from their “main partner”, the number one significant other in their life.
For instance, one partner might enjoy the way someone else can satisfy them that their long term partner cannot do for them. When two people are very secure with themselves and a lot of trust is established then both feel comfortable allowing the other to have different mates.
They can be of the same sex or different depending upon their mood for the day/night. Some couples choose to play with other couples and keep it with just them or they may branch off and find a couple mates to play with when they are feeling frisky or their husband/wife might be tired, a woman may have just had a baby and cannot have sex for at least six weeks, their partner might travel and leave their significant other feeling like they need someone to fulfill their sexual desires while they are recovering.
Each couple chooses together what their life will look like within their relationship and plan and play accordingly. The benefits are they often times create lasing friendships with others of the opposite sex while enjoying sexual pleasures from them as well.
Things never get stale and it usually spices up the bedroom when both mates are personally with each other. Some couples enjoy watching other couples and learn to role play and seek sexual excitement from the scenerios they create with others and follow through on.
To each his own and many people find their egos get a boost, self esteem is significantly increased as well as their moods, relationships might last longer if couples feel less pressure in the bedroom, no one has any financial obligations, and for some who cannot remain faithful find ways like this to still be married and have a family but are able to see others on the side to fulfill sexual pleasures outside of a loving relationship where both people agree this is what is best for them.
I believe it is best for couples to be discreet when choosing to be a swinger and that children are never involved. If family finds out their loved ones are involved in such a different wild lifestyle it could create a lot of turmoil. I would definitely error on the side of being cautious, but if you are curious then by all means openly discuss with your partner or if you are single then why not give it a try? You might just find you like it a lot more than you thought you would.
I understand this type of bizarre lifestyle does not work for everyone, however, the ones it does work for absolutely live by it and love it. If all of the rules and boundaries are followed and everyone is happy, there really isn’t any harm in living together this way!